The Difference between Men and women; the Trans perspective. Intro & Part 1: Communication
Intro
Intro
I am an INTJ, Libra, transexual woman. I lived as a man for 30 years. I started HRT, 13March2019. I was also married, and can relate to what many men feel in relationships, but now see it from a different light. As a Bi Transexeual woman, I can also see how the two sexes differ, and believe most of it has to do with hormones. My body reacted to the hormones immediately. After 3 months my Testosterone levels were in normal female ranges. Brain Function has some to do with it as well, and most trans people’s brains function more like their Gender Identity. Which explains why there are some areas I have always related to women, and had a disconnect with other men.
I have taken a lot of heat for expressing these opinions. That’s all these are opinions. it is only my experience, and It is not rooted in science. (I am not a doctor) I speak in stereotypes and generalizations. Everyone is different, so this will not apply to all. I am using how I felt as a man, compared to how I feel now as a woman. This series, will dive into the difference between men in women on the grounds of Sexual libido/satisfaction down to the emotional differences. They are not meant to invalidate anyone else’s experience. I just feel I have a unique perspectives and insights to provide.
I am looking for others opinions to quote in this series. Please send suggested topics. I would love to have perspective from Trans men to get a different perspectives as well. You can send me a DM on Twitter (@sara_james2) or just write a message here.
Part 1: Communication
Verbal
Men, how many times have you heard, “are you listening to me”, “did you hear what I said?” Or women, how many times have you felt your man isn’t listening? Oddly enough, it seems to me, hormones have a lot to play in this. Once my Hormones hit female levels, I noticed the difference in how men and women communicate. For me it was a complete switch. I get more emotional benefits from talking to someone for hours on end, than watching tv. I went from being focused on the show, to more focused on the person I’m talking to. This would lead me to believe the reason is more hormonal than what most want to admit.
I was that man who was always distracted. My wife would be talking to me, and I would hear half of what she said. It’s not something I’m proud of, but I know it is something that happens a lot between married couples.
Men can be silent and maybe say a couple meaningless words about the game they are watching. Women like to have long sit down conversation about everything that is going on in their lives. Women as typically more emotional beings, the intimacy of a one on one conversation gives them fulfillment. With their partner, this is what leads them to build an emotional connection. It leads to them to feel more attracted to that person, and is something most women need for intimacy.
Physical: Cuddling
I liked to cuddle before, but the feelings were different. It didn’t create the connection it does now. Since hormones reduce libido in trans woman, sex drive doesn’t control my emotions the same. In a way it clears the way for gratification in other stuff. Sometimes I cuddle with someone and just feel good in that moment; before I would be thinking about more. I understand why women like to cuddle after sex too. It means so much more to me than it did before. It only makes the intimacy that much better.
Conclusion
Men or women, realize the way just communicating with your girl makes her feel.Turn the TV off and have deep conversations with her. Women understand that men dont get the same satisfaction just talking or cuddling. It’s not because he doesn’t want to, or doesn’t care what you have to say. Hormones play a big role in this. Come together and find a way to make each other happy.
*I am not a doctor of any sort. These are my opinions, based on my experience. If you are having issues with your significant other, I recommend seeing a counselor.